Rose Stanley has held a training role skilling and resourcing voluntary pastoral workers in schools, and most recently has trained volunteers specifically in the role of ‘companion’ in the Seasons for Growth programme.
Rose has also been writing for the past 10 years, both as a freelance writer for the parenting magazine Tots to Teens, and as a published author of children’s books: Tilly’s Big Problem, A Hot Cup of Chocolate and Emotions in Motion (all three published by Duck Creek Press), and Brain Tricks (Cheeky Dragon Collaborations). The Story of You is Rose’s fifth children’s book to date. Rose talks to NZ Booklovers.
Tell us a little about The Story of You.
This book is my way of honouring all the stories I have heard shared over the past 12 years working within Auckland schools, in a pastoral care and support capacity. I have seen so much courage, resilience, and humour shine through.
What inspired you to write this book?
Two elements to my inspiration:
1. The kids I have journeyed with, most recently working in small groups as a Seasons for Growth companion.
2. Jehan Casinader’s story, ‘This Is Not How It Ends’. Everyone should read this book! I emailed him recently to acknowledge this and received a very warm and encouraging response.
What research was involved?
The importance of story is a recurring theme which has turned up in myriad ways in my life, both from a personal and a professional perspective. I have seen firsthand in the Seasons for Growth program how valuable it is to give participants the chance to share a part of their story with the group. I have heard comments from children right through to adults around the feelings of relief knowing that they had been heard, that sharing their story was a load off their shoulders. I have witnessed the growing awareness for people as they identify their own resilience and strength – qualities they might not have identified in themselves before.
After reading Jehan Casinader’s book ‘This Is Not How It Ends’ I was even more conscious of the power of story – how we can change our perspective on our stories, and re-tell them in a more hopeful way. There is prolific research to support this idea, and in counselling practice it is called narrative therapy. Narrative therapy works on the underlying belief that we establish our identities through the stories we tell ourselves. Depending on our perspective, we can empower ourselves to learn and grow and become more resilient or alternatively, inhibit ourselves by looking through a less empowering lens; for instance, focussing on where we are lacking, and what we did wrong.
What was your routine or process when writing this book?
My process was to keep putting it down, having a break, then coming back to it. Not being too precious about any of the concepts so that I could be ruthless about the number of words. I wanted this book to communicate concepts simply and economically so that the message was not over cluttered.
How did you work with the illustrator?
I communicated with the Production Department, going back and forth about illustration style, then once that was decided, they would send me draft illustrations and ask for my feedback until the final proofs were accepted.
If a soundtrack were made to accompany this book, name a song or two you would include?
My brain has gone completely blank on this one – I know I will think of suitable options in the middle of the night, but perhaps ‘Brave’ by Sarah Bareilles would be one; it’s one we often play for the kids in Seasons for Growth program, to encourage them that their voice is valuable.
What did you enjoy the most about writing this book?
This was an idea I kept picking up and putting down, spending time on it when I had some space from the mundane routines of everyday life. I tried to intentionally create any specific expectation about whether it would end up being published. This meant that I was able to let the writing process happen without pressure. I am aware that some people work well under deadline conditions, but I don't tend to – hence my Instagram handle ‘Well brood’. My creativity seems to more often than not take considerable time to brew, with me ‘brooding’ about it for quite a while before the idea is ready to hatch!
What do you hope children will take away from reading?
I would love to think that children can feel encouraged to tell their story, their way, with their voice coming through strongly. Not how an adult would re-tell it on their behalf. Not with anyone else’s ‘filter’ over it or agenda around how their experience needs to be interpreted. Just their truth; “This is how it happened for me; this is how I felt.”
What did you do to celebrate finishing this book?
I have to admit that as yet no such celebration has taken place! However, I consider the book launch as a celebration – as well as a way of thanking all my friends and family who have supported me, both before and during the process of writing. Very longsuffering!
What is the favourite book you have read so far this year and why?
Early on this year I got handed a second-hand copy of ‘Sensitive: The Power of a Thoughtful Mind in an Overwhelming World’. I found it so helpful – I now understand myself a lot better! I have also been able to encourage other sensitive people to go easy on themselves and appreciate that even though the actual word ‘sensitive’ is often used as a bit of a put-down, in its truest sense the term means responsive. Those of us who identify with this sensitivity are much more responsive to the world around us. This includes doing a lot more perceiving information via the senses, and then thinking about that information in a deep way, drawing on other memories, knowledge, and ideas.
What’s next on the agenda for you?
Another kids’ book concept is brewing, and I am developing an adult non-fiction idea too